Look what I found on my recent visit to Beijing. The fulfillment of every man's dream. A no-touch electronic urinal. Can you believe that? It's an answer to the prayers of those who had to fumble around while having their hands full (or gainfully occupied).
Quite a marvel of modern engineering, I must say. It must have taken a mix of robotics, AI, biology, ballistics, not to mention rocket science, to build this masterpiece. How does it work? Perhaps, a gloved robotic hand that unzips your pants, takes your pecker out, directs the fountain and puts it back in after a mandatory shake or two.
I did not take it for a test drive despite all my curiosity. In their quest to make things cheaper, the Chinese are known to take a snip or two at quality. The painful thought of having my pecker caught in the zipper came to mind. Also, as much as I'd like to be well hung as the next guy, having it inadvertently stretched around would not be my favorite method. In these "delicate" matters, you need to be extra sure that it works right before you take it for a "spin" (or rather the other way around - before it takes you for a spin). After all, we are talking about the part of our anatomy that does most of the thinking for us.
Hopefully, the next time I go back, I will google the feedback on this beaut to ensure that it is well tested and go for a controlled leak (the way Chinese Big Brother expects me to pee). I could definitely get used to this. Think of all that you can do now with your hands like picking your nose, scratching your bum (if someone could do something about that "hard to get to" itch), fingering your armpits (for that whiff of pleasure), etc.
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